Monday, March 01, 2010

Healing your birth patterns with EFT

The mother-child relationship is one of the most important relationships we can have. It gives birth to who we are and our patterns in this life. This is true even if we are raised by a grandmother or someone else, to us they will be our mother in every sense of the word. Bonding and attachment occurs when our mother is fully present with us, we interpret this as feeling loved, feeling nourished and feeling secure. As Silvia Hartmann says “Love arises when attention is absolute”.

Proper attachment provides us with a solid foundation from which we can grow, explore and blossom. For various reasons, this mother and child bonding is not always possible or easy. Lack of attachment can cause trauma. In his book Biology of Love, Dr Arthur Janov writes:
What's love got to do with it? More than we can imagine. Love is not simply a word uttered to a child, but an act of feeling that, ironically, most often requires no words. If we hug and kiss our child and adore her, she will get the message and her life will be utterly different. If we don't, words won't help. In Biology of Love, I shall offer the reader a new concept of love, one more in keeping with information about the brain and psychology. We will see how concrete love actually is, not just each person's idea of what it is. We will discover how love ultimately determines how we think, feel, perceive, and act as adults. It determines how long we live and what illnesses we will fall prey to later in life. It is no exaggeration to say that early lack of love already sets the limits on how long we will live and how happy our lives will be.
Julia Margaret Cameron My Grandchild, 1865

What patterns and feelings keep showing up in your life? Fill in the blanks.

My whole life I have felt …
My whole life I have …
My whole life I have not ...
My whole life I have been …
My whole life has been …
My whole life I have wanted …
My whole life I have not wanted …
My whole life I felt I could
My whole life I felt I could not ...
My whole life others have felt … about me
My whole life others have said … about me
My whole life I have had to …
My whole life I needed …

You can choose to heal these patterns. Life has a way of nudging us in the direction of healing too, whether we consciously know this or not. We will attract events and people that match up with the beliefs we hold about our self. It is like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle which fit perfectly together. In particular, relationships will trigger your patterns and beliefs. The man or woman in our life seems to have a knack of reminding us of our parents, and particularly how we felt around our parents. This is so we can heal the patterns and beliefs that we think illustrate who we are. Tapping diagram.

Let us prepare to sail into unchartered waters, to take an extraordinary trip into the depths of the unconscious. Once there, we'll find it to be a place full of light, insight, and peace. All those hidden demons- those painful memories lodged in the brain that caused a shutdown in the baby and adult- will be liberated. We call them demons but they are not. They are precise needs and memories that are imprinted and surge forth in a constant effort to find their way out of the unconscious.” Biology of Love ~ Dr Arthur Janov

1 comment:

Noreen said...

"The more loved we feel, the higher our Life Energy and the more truly healthy we become. This inability to feel loved relates at an unconscious level to all our relationships, but that with our mothers is the most important. The mother-child relationship is the fundamental human relationship: She was our whole world when we were young, and she is, in a metaphorical sense, our whole world now. It is our lack of belief in her ever-constant love, her pure maternal instinct that is the root cause of our anguish—the universal anguish of the human condition." Dr John Diamond