Friday, August 25, 2017

Bracing against


Try tapping on the following script, making sure to customise it for you, diagram here.

Even though I brace when … I completely accept my need to brace

Even though I didn’t realise that bracing against … is what is keeping it in place, I’m open to learning how to release this …

Even though I don’t always have to work on this … I can take breaks when I need to and that feels …

Top of head: I have to brace against …
Eyebrow: Or it will swamp me
Side of eye: It’s too frightening to feel …
Under the eye: I don’t have to feel … all the time
Under nose: I can take breaks
Under chin: That part or parts need reassurance I’ll come back
Collar bone: I only seem to take notice
Under the arm: When I feel bad

Top of head: When they feel bad
Eyebrow: Otherwise I ignore them
Side of eye: So they have to get my attention
Under the eye: Any way they can
Under nose: I need to show them that I’ll
Under chin: Be there for them
Collar bone: For the good
Under the arm: And the bad

Top of head: They need to know
Eyebrow: I won’t abandon them
Side of eye: I don’t have to feel … all the time
Under the eye: I can soothe … instead
Under nose: I don’t have to fix this
Under mouth: I just have to be there
Collar bone: And be kind
Under the arm: To all parts of me and how they feel

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

The importance of trauma informed care

If you knew that there was one root cause that is the foundation of most mental and physical illnesses, wouldn’t you want to know what it is? Wouldn’t you do almost anything to find out what it is, so you could finally get to the bottom of any chronic issue that is plaguing you or someone you love? Wouldn’t you wonder why anyone who is a health professional would not know what it is?

I sometimes think that I must be living in a bubble of people who know what the root cause is, because it is only when I enter the mainstream by say, going to a doctor, that I realise that many people don’t know and don’t even know that they don’t know. It always surprises me and leaves me quite frustrated. Or maybe, they’re not interested in finding and treating the root cause, because going down the road of symptoms is much more profitable because it’s a merry-go-round that you (the client or patient) can never get off and which, very often, if not always, leads to retraumatisation and a worsening of symptoms. I’d rather not believe the last scenario to be true, but unfortunately the evidence speaks for itself.

What is at the root of many mental and physical illnesses? The answer is: unresolved trauma. This might not be new to some of you and others might be saying that it couldn’t be so simple and others might be saying that I’m talking sh*t. But mountains of growing research and anecdotal evidence shows that unresolved trauma, particularly early in life, is the cause of a massive stress overload on our nervous systems leading to chronic health issues. A dysregulated nervous system results in a dysregulated body and mind.

Therefore, the crucial importance of any health professional being trauma-informed cannot be overstated. Too many doctors are handing out prescriptions for symptoms, with direct effects, not side effects, and sometimes those effects lead to death, or, at best, an extremely poor quality of life. There are too many diagnoses, many of them supposedly co-morbid, when the root cause is completely neglected. This is nowhere near good enough, too many are suffering, too many are at the end of their tether, too many are at breaking point, or have already broken down. We need to do a lot lot better, because unresolved trauma is the most important health issue facing our world today.

Thursday, August 10, 2017

I shouldn't be feeling this way

There’s no surer way for an emotion or physical sensation to get stuck than us thinking we shouldn’t be feeling a certain way. It could be that we believe that we ‘should be’ over it, or else the 4 biggies are getting in the way of us feeling the emotion or sensation. And they are:
  • It feels awful
  • Shame
  • Guilt
  • Disloyalty

Try the following set up statements to help you dissolve whatever blocks you might have when you ‘should’ on yourself.

Even though I shouldn’t be feeling this way, I’m a bad person for feeling this way, I am open to accepting this emotion

Even though I believe that this emotion is bad because … I accept that’s the way I feel right now

Even though this sensation feels awful, it’s not possible to feel it without … I accept how I feel

Even though I feel disloyal for feeling this way towards … I accept that I don’t want to hurt anyone

Even though I might be hurting myself by not feeling this feeling, I am open to feeling some of this feeling

Even though I should be over this by now (your belief or others?), I'm moving at a pace that feels ...

Thursday, August 03, 2017

Even though I'm afraid to go inside ...

Whenever an experience is too much for us, we have the ability to store it away inside our bodies and minds until we can feel it later. This is an absolutely brilliant coping mechanism that gets us through some tough times. Because storing it away has seemingly been so successful, we think we can do it forever, but we can’t. Our system becomes too full and starts overflowing with anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue syndrome, heart disease, thyroid disorders and so on. I’m not suggesting that trauma is 100% responsible for every condition or symptom, but research shows that it plays a huge role in many dis-eases when it is unresolved and frozen for a long time.


Going inside our bodies can be absolutely terrifying, so we avoid it at all costs which is totally understandable. What we need to do is titrate, that is, go slowly, bit by bit, until the stored pain and hurt can be felt and released. This isn’t always what we want to hear when we’re suffering, we want it gone yesterday, but it doesn’t work like that. It has usually taken years for pain to accumulate and it will take time to sift through it, otherwise we risk extreme overwhelm which is counterproductive and can set us back and make us even more afraid of our pain. Try the following statements to help you find the courage to go inside at a pace that feels safe and comfortable for you. Repeat whatever feels right on the points, diagram here.

Even though I’m afraid to go inside, I accept how I feel

Even though I get overwhelmed by all the stuff stored inside, I don’t know where to start, I’ll do it at my own pace and I’ll do it with help

Even though a part of me doesn’t want to feel what’s inside, another part knows I have to feel it, or it will keep showing up in ways I don’t like, I accept this conflict and how both parts of me feel

Even though I’m scared of this mountain of hurt, it’s too big for me, I accept that it’s absolutely ok to be afraid