Control is never achieved when sought after directly. It is the surprising outcome of letting go ~ James Arthur Ray
Many people react to not feeling in control with fear. Fear is often defined as false expectations appearing real. How does fear show up in your life? A knot in your stomach, anxiety, or panic attacks? The mind will resist letting go or surrendering as it does not feel in control. When you recognise this, it will lessen your fear and resistance to accepting what is.
As Eckhart Tolle writes in The Power of Now :
The greater part of human pain is unnecessary. It is self-created as long as the unobserved mind runs your life.
The pain that you create now is always some form of nonacceptance, some form of unconscious resistance to what is. On the level of thought, the resistance is some form of judgment. On the emotional level, it is some form of negativity. The intensity of the pain depends on how strongly you are identified with your mind. The mind always seeks to deny the Now and to escape from it. In other words, the more you are identified with your mind, the more you suffer. Or you may put it like this: the more you are able to honour and accept the Now, the more you are free of pain, of suffering----and free of the egoic mind.
Why does the mind habitually deny or resist the Now? Because it cannot function and remain in control without time, which is past and future, so it perceives the timeless Now as threatening. Time and mind are in fact inseparable.
In energetic terms, the more you resist what is, the more intensely you will experience and feel an energetic disturbance. Emotionally this can manifest as fear, terror, guilt or anger and it may also manifest physically and mentally. You can correct this energetic short circuit with EFT so your energy will flow as it is supposed to. Accepting what is helps keep your energy moving. And paradoxically, acceptance is needed for change to occur. Flow and movement are the opposite to resistance.
As your faith is strengthened you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, to your great delight and benefit ~ Emmanuel Teney
Diagram of tapping points