Making friends with a condition or issue is the same as making friends with your self. It might be easier for us to believe, and more true, that instead of having created these issues, they are the manifestations of how we reacted and responded to life events that we had no control over. I don't believe we have 100% control over life's events, what we can control and choose is our ability to respond.
But don't we need the resources to be able to do that? Does a three year old have the resources to choose her reaction or response to her father sexually abusing her? I don't believe so, she can't do anything about it except to cut off her pain in whatever way she can so she doesn't feel it, because it's too overwhelming. This cutting off or shutting down, can take the form of dissociating, acting out, becoming subdued and compliant and so on. I like the way traumas and conditions are described in Emotrance as “injuries to our spiritual or energetic body”, because that is exactly what they are. They hurt just like an injury hurts, but often these hurts are hidden and invisible. These Injuries need to be repaired so our energy can flow again. We can't repair what we are fighting and resisting, we are just making our injury bigger and sorer. We think we are resisting what happened or what was done to us, but in actual fact, mostly we are resisting feeling our own pain. We are fighting our self and our pain. Feeling our pain, making friends with it, is the way to repairing these old injuries.
That idea is fundamental ~ to feel pain and not to resist; to go towards it. It is an incredibly spiritual practice ~ Christy Turlington