In the last year I’ve come to know and appreciate the value of resting. I used to have a pattern of pushing through things, as so many of us do, getting my value from what I did, rather than who I was. If I didn’t feel I did enough during the day, it got to the point where I felt I didn’t deserve a good night’s sleep.
As Gabor Maté says in When the Body Says No, when we don’t learn to say No, our body will do it for us. Self care is not optional, it’s essential. We can only pour from a full cup. What’s in the cup is for us and what overflows is for others as Iyanla Vanzant says.
Something that I have found very helpful for helping me to rest deeply are yoga nidra meditations. I’m listening to Daring to Rest by Karen Brody at the moment and it’s really good. We need to take some time out every day where we can have some silence and down time. It can really help soothe our frazzled nerves in the hectic, information overload world that we live in. Tapping can also help, but we can often slide into ‘getting rid of’ it mode and we end up trying too hard/struggling/pushing through to fix/heal ourself. Try resting alongside whatever methods work for you and don’t forget to practice being human, give yourself a rest from doing.
Try tapping on:
Even though I need to struggle because … I completely accept how I feel
Even though I don’t know how to stop … I accept myself anyway
Even though my self worth is wrapped up in what I do, achieve, and others, that’s ok, I’m doing the best I can
Top of the head: Maybe I can contemplate doing a little less
Eyebrow: How does that feel?
Side of eye: It feels …
Under the eye: It’s exhausting doing, doing, doing
Under the nose: I can’t keep this pace up
Under the chin: I need to rest
Collar bone: How does that feel?
Under the arm: It feels …
Top of the head: Pushing through things has become a pattern
Eyebrow: Keeping busy helps me …
Side of eye: If I sat still I’d feel …
Under the eye: And that makes me feel …
Under the nose: Maybe I can contemplate resting more
Under the chin: The benefits would be enormous
Collar bone: I need this
Under the arm: And I want to rest more
Keep tapping on whatever feels right for you.
I'd like to mention a book that has also helped me which is The Way of Rest by Jeff Foster.