Setbacks

Setbacks are inevitable; they don’t mean there’s something wrong with you or that things will never get better. By being prepared for setbacks, we know that we’re still ok when they happen and that our journey doesn’t always take a straight path.

Psychiatrist, Bessel van der Kolk says our biggest fear is that our pain will never end. However, fearing something doesn’t make it true, though it can certainly feel true. If you are afraid that things will never change, it is a really important issue to tap on.

It’s vital to be honest about how you really feel. The bigger the emotional charge you have on something, the more you realise you’ve hit gold in terms of being able to resolve what’s really bothering you. It can be scary to admit our fears around certain things, it can make them seem more real, but they are already real to you and tapping on them can help you to soothe them.

Be yourself

If I've learned anything in life, it's that I may as well be myself. It's too exhausting to live any other way. We like it (mostly) when people are themselves and we can sense it when they're not being themselves. We exhaust ourselves by playing along with any falseness, whether it comes from us or others.

It's not always easy to be ourself and growing up, we might not have had the chance and safety to be ourself and discover who we truly are. But I think we've always had a sense of it, deep down. It's up to us to live into who we really are. I think life calls us to do that.

It takes courage to be yourself. Remember, you're being yourself to be true to yourself, not to piss others off. And you will piss some people off when you know yourself; what you want, don't want, what you will tolerate and what you won't.

The good thing is that people will trust your Yeses when you say No on the odd occasion or maybe even every time you want to say No :-)