Hurt is the most basic negative (or uncomfortable) emotion we can feel, as Deepak Chopra, states in his book, Ageless Body, Timeless Mind. When we don't know or have never learned how to be with, feel and express our hurt, it will build up. When we're full up and can't take any more which can often be precipitated by a life crisis, our buried hurt and pain starts to leak and its effects are often felt as anxiety and depression. States like anxiety and depression are secondary formations once we learned not to feel or express our hurt in the moment. Our body wants to release hurt the moment it occurs but we humans have the power to suspend and freeze painful experiences. Only thing is, we often later forget to feel them or don't want to feel them, just because they were so painful the first time round. So the frozen experiences stay trapped in our nervous system as undischarged stress. Because anxiety is a state of many many experiences of unfelt pain, it overrides the natural release mechanism of the body and mind, so it can and very often does lead to overwhelm.
The effects of anxiety are acutely felt in the body, anxiety can make us feel like we want to climb out of our skin, and go somewhere where the pain doesn't exist or where we can't feel it. Because we can't physically step out of our skins, we'll find all sorts of creative ways to help us numb and sedate our pain while we're in our bodies. Food helps us do it, especially carbohydrates and sweets, cigarettes will do it as will dissociating, racing thoughts will do it in an attempt to regain some control, alcohol, drugs, watching television, anything and everything that you can use to distract yourself from that frozen ball of pain humming away in your nervous system.
This is why using the body, its felt sense and sensations is so effective in helping us to release undischarged stress and hurt that has become anxiety.
Try using these set up statements and reminder phrases, keep going until you feel a shift/release and make sure to customise it for you, locate body sensations, see if they move or change as you tap. Set an intention of helping this frozen energy move, not to try and 'get rid of' the pain or hurt. You know from experience that resisting your hurt only makes it worse. You can't release what you're resisting. Listen and tap along
Even though I don't want to be in my body, where all the hurt is, that's the way it is for now
Even though this pain is humming away in my nervous system waiting to erupt, I acknowledge it's there
Even though I just can't feel this pain, it's too painful, maybe I can feel some of it
Top of the Head: These anxious feelings
Eyebrow: They are so hard to live with
Side of Eye: I’d love some peace
Under Eye: From this
Under Nose: I just don’t feel safe
Under Chin: Or in control
Collar Bone: I feel overwhelmed
Under Arm: I have to distract myself from that
Top of the Head: I keep thinking
Eyebrow: That I should be over this!
Side of Eye: But I can’t release this anxiety
Under Eye: Or overwhelm
Under Nose: And that makes me feel ...
Under Chin: What’s wrong with me?
Collar Bone: I’m exhausted
Under Arm: I feel . . .
Top of the Head: Maybe I'll release the pain instead
Eyebrow: The pain that makes up this anxiety
Side of Eye: And tap
Under Eye: On all this pain
Under Nose: This frozen unfelt pain
Under Chin: And hurt
Collar Bone: I never wanted to feel that hurt
Under Arm: And I still don't
Top of the Head: I want to feel safe and comfortable in my own body
Eyebrow: I don’t want to keep running away
Side of Eye: From these feelings
Under Eye: And me
Under Nose: And my body
Under Chin: Breathing helps me feel my body
Collar Bone: Breathing helps calm me
Under Arm: And brings me back into my body
Top of the Head: Where I choose to feel safe
Eyebrow: And protected
Side of Eye: I choose to inhabit my body fully
Under Eye: And completely
Under Nose: And feel good
Under Chin: And light
Collar Bone: And joyous
Under Arm: And just be me!!