Whenever help is sought or given for a "problem" child, help is needed for the entire family. It can be all too easy to scapegoat, blame and project. What is needed first and foremost is willingness and accountability, particularly on the part of any adults in the situation. Children do what we do, not what we say and they are excellent students of the adults in their life.
We were born with four words engraved on our bodies: "love me, hold me". We always knew we wanted that, though we may not have had permission to say it out loud ~ David Richo